An older lady caned her way eagerly towards me. “What was he like?” she asked. “The Governor?”
“Where?” I asked.
“Why, that man you were just visiting with is the Governor.”
“That soft, pudgy guy I was just sitting with?”
She paused… “He’s our State Governor!!!”
“Oh, I thought he was an attorney for National Public Radio. I don’t think he’s all there.” She glared and walked away.
I have a lot of conversations with a lot of people. I don’t know if that guy was the Governor or not, but if he is, the kind folks of Washington ought to get their valves adjusted and some new spark plugs. That guy was a bit slow. Then again who am I to judge coming down from the hills and all.
A lively conversation started between a young woman and the man to her right until he got up and left. I was watching the goings on across the way and was aware that a fat black guy was noisily offering directions to all who stopped at his kiosk. While observing, a lady who was trying to read the inbound/outbound turned to me. “Can you help me sir?”
“Are you needing flight assistance?”
“See that black guy over there? I think he is the guy to ask.” She thanked me kindly and scurried off as the young gal hissed, “That’s racist!”
“What would you have said?”
“I would have said ‘that guy’.”
“That… over there…. (There were guys everywhere.) Oh….. maybe it was OK. You’re not racist.”
“Glad to have your approval. You’re not from here.”
“I’m from New Hampshire. How did you know?”
“You are clearly female.”
“Look for yourself.” She looked around. “The women here ARE a bit manly aren’t they.” I nodded.
“How do you know they are women?” I asked, smirking. She glanced around again and suppressed a laugh. “I see your point.”
“Oh well, you called that black guy a guy so you are sexist too. I suppose we are even.”
We had a nice chat and I learned she was looking for a Guru and had found one in Seattle. I’m pretty sure there is a plane full of people heading for New Hampshire right this minute that have found a guru there. What ever floats your boat, I suppose.
She stood up. “I’ve gotta go and figure out when and where my friends are supposed to arrive.”
“Maybe you ought to go ask that black guy.” I offered. She shook her head in resignation.
The airport bar looks interesting. Nah. I don’t want a drink.
A healthy, athletic, black gal sat near me. “Those seats are more comfy.” I offered. She moved over and thanked me. 10 minutes passed and she said “Is everyone from here as friendly as you?”
“I dunno. Give or take I guess. Where are you from?”
“Are people friendly there?”
“Oh no. It made me nervous that you spoke to me cause I’m not used to that but then I remembered that I’m here to have different experiences.”
“Glad I could be a different experience.”
“So are you from around here?” she asked.
“I live a few hours East.”
“I’m sure glad you people from this area are so nice!”
“Thank you. Enjoy your visit.”
I pondered what she meant by ‘you people’ and found it curious that Denver is 3 hours and 5 minutes East of here and she considered a few hours East to mean ‘from this area’.
Maybe I should check out the bar.
A young couple asked if they could sit at my table so they could watch the walkway from the perfect view my table offered. “Sure, Why not?” Two whiskeys later they had told me enough I could have sold them into slavery.
“And I just got my PhD” she bubbled “and if all goes well Jimmy will have his in 3 months!”
“Sounds real nice. Have the two of you considered getting an education?”
She looked startled then laughed. “You almost got me!” They patted each other reassuringly. “We’ll be fine now with our degree behind us.” He smiled lovingly at her.
“A PhD will only get you so far in life. You kids really ought to consider getting an education.” I smiled inwardly sipping my drink. They looked uncomfortably back and forth and agreed that they had to go.
If society stays as it is, they will be fine. If we turn cannibal, I’m gonna get fat while they go extinct.
As they hurried away, a wrinkled soul from the last century smiled at me and asked if she could rest her tired feet and soon we had built great rapport. “Young man, you are quite a surprise!”
She leaned in and asked me if I would be in the area long enough to visit some sights and maybe enjoy a favorite pastime or two. Her hand reached to hold mine and her eyes twinkled merrily.
I bet she was a real looker 55 years ago.
I haven’t been called a ‘young man’ for quite some time and I realized there was a 35 year-old living in that wrinkled body.
Very compelling…. I smiled at her. “You know though,” I teased, “in 30 years your proposal will be considered sexual harassment.”
“I know.” Her eyes sparkling. “Shall we get to it then?”
We were interrupted by a security officer. “Ma’am, is this man bothering you?”
“Oh no! He is wonderful company!”
I stood up. “You know, I gotta go anyway. Pleased to meet you Miss.”
The Rent-A-Cop followed me. “Excuse me sir. We had a complaint that you were rude to a couple.”
“I’m rude to a lot of people. The flight should be here in about 45 minutes and I’ll be gone.”
“You come wait with Tammy.”
Tammy was a security officer, a fat man with make-up. He came and sat with me for the ‘safety of Seattle’ and I could see his 5 o’clock shadow growing through his make-up. His hair on top was long and in a ponytail.
“So Tammy….” He glanced at me. “How long have you lived in Seattle?”
“You smell like booze. Have you been drinking?”
So Tammy……. “You got a husband and kids?”
He ignored me.
I stared at him and wondered how he had survived.
“So Tammy…… How long have you been a cop?” He got up and waddled off to a chair further away.
A song started working into my head.
‘Twas an evening in October, I’ll confess I wasn’t sober,
I was carting home a load with manly pride,
When my feet began to stutter and I fell into the gutter,
And a pig came up and lay down by my side.
Then I lay there in the gutter and my heart was all a-flutter,
Till a lady, passing by, did chance to say:
“You can tell a man that boozes by the company he chooses,”
Then the pig got up and slowly
waddled walked away.
The old lady spied me as she hurried by with the passenger she had been waiting for. “I hope to see you again if God willing!” she flirted. “So long.” I responded.
Soon I heard the announcement I was waiting for.
6 and 1/2 hours in Seattle is a LONG time.